No Sleep for you Mama

Happy Valentine’s Day!

It’s earlier in the morning at my house. Well, let me say this…it’s still night time to me. I haven’t made it to bed yet and it looks like I’m not going to any time soon. I had to escape from Tyse. He is sitting in his bouncer at the moment crying. He has been crying for a while now and I need a break.

He fell asleep tonight on his mat at 10:00pm. I thought “Yeah, it looks like I will sleep tonight.” I shouldn’t have assumed. I feed him at 10:30pm and finished at 12:00am. It takes a long time to feed him through the tube. Feeding through the tube doesn’t take that long, but with Tyse I have to go extreme slowly. I put Tyse in his crib at 12:00am. Two minutes later I heard screaming. I ran into the bedroom and Tyse was soaked. He ended up vomiting in his crib. I couldn’t believe it. This is why I have to feed him slow, but it doesn’t seem to be slow enough. I have tried the feeding pump and feed him over a long period of time, but it still didn’t work. Believe me, I have tried everything. I am told it has to do the brain. Since he did have a brain injury this remains mystery.

It took me almost an hour to get him to calm down. Finally, I had him back in bed at 1:00am. I climbed into bed and started thinking about life. I always do this. I think about the couldas, wouldas, and the shouldas. For example, I wish Tyse could walk so when he isn’t feeling well he could come get me or climb in bed with me. I wish I would have gone to school instead of having a family. I should have followed my dreams rather then following my heart. My eyes were slowly closing when Tyse woke up. I looked at the clock and it was 2:00am. He has been crying non stop. I have tried everything. I have sang him his favorite lullaby song, rocked him in the chair, walked around with him, laid him on the floor, tried playing with him, but nothing is working. I know he isn’t hungry. He might have aspirated. I don’t know. I’ll have to keep track of his temperature.

Right now, he is arching his back a lot. It has to do with Cerebral Palsy. I am told this is one of the things that they do a lot. Tyse doesn’t do it all the time, but I have noticed he is starting too. It makes it really difficult on holding him. He is so strong and can fight back. If it wasn’t winter and Tyse didn’t get sick so much then I would take him for a drive. I think that would make him fall asleep. Confession: I drink lots of caffeine; in others words Pop/Soda to keep me up all the time and I probably gained 10-15 pounds doing so. I can’t wait till Tyse starts sleeping through the night again so I can lose the weight I have gained. Chances of me napping during the day today are very slim. He has therapy this afternoon, but I may have to cancel due to him not feeling well.

I bought this new chair for Tyse called Rock N Dine Rocker/Booster. It is a chair that you hook on to the table at a restaurant or he can use it as a rocking chair. He actually did rock himself in the chair. He moved his feet a little bit and he started rocking back and forth. That was pretty awesome to see. He did alright today. He is still biting his lip, having trouble swallowing his secretions, sounds congested and having trouble sleeping. Maybe there is a light at the end of the tunnel that we are in.


I like this picture (below) because he was cooing when I took it.